I'm scared

I'm scared. Right now even when I'm typing this. I'm guessing it must be the cumulative effect of everything that happened tonight. And if you're thinking of all possible scary and dangerous encounters that could freak me out, think again. What exactly happened was that I went to watch a movie. Period.

LOL.

We watched 'Lust, caution' by Tony Leung, Tang Wei (just coined her name in english spelling so most probably it's wrong- don't kill me if you're a fan of hers). It was a really good movie, very intense and thought-provoking. That kind where there's minimal dialogue, lots of eye contact (and I mean like A LOT) and subtle facial expressions. My guess is that the characters must actually be highly skilled in telepathy to be able to understand the nuances in their conversation with each other! Anyway, me here has no telepathic skills whatsoever so the most I could do was to only make wild guesses at the 'isi tersirat' which is embedded in virtually EVERY conversation. Or more appropriately every encounter of the characters with each other.

I can sense undercurrents beneath the smooth surface of polite conversation, the atmosphere seems to be charged with intensity, but exactly with what kind of emotions that I'm not sure. One can only guess so much. Were Tang Wei's furtive glances actually flirtations? And Tony Leung's expressions were so impenetrable. I had not a clue to what was on his mind most of the time. To me, his expressions are all the same but filled with an intensity which I have no idea for what. But SW said she could tell the difference in his expressions, so maybe I'm just blurr. Oh, and I was only enlightened after the movie about his look of arousal when Tang Wei was removing her stockings. It seems only I didn't notice.

Maybe it's because I'm not a fan of Tony Leung. I agree he's charismatic, but somehow I don't feel his magnetism. Different wavelength. Maybe if Andy Lau were casted....... Hmmm.........=P

Anyway, our conclusion after the movie was that Lust, Caution is 85% on Lust. Now when I think about it, Caution too. Which is actually it's title la. Duh.

BDSM scene included also. =P But of course the later parts were censored, but since it's Malaysia I feel lucky even that they showed Tony Leung tearing off Tang Wei's skirt, and also tying her hands with his belt. Bondage all right!

Altogether, Tang Wei tries to communicate 'lust and caution' through her flitting glances (Her eyes are normally darting here and there) and Tony Leung settles for his usual 'penetrating stare'(very intense, but I don't feel the chemistry cos different wavelength; unlike someone =P).

I have this nagging suspicion that come whatever scene, the actors just apply the same formula: TangWei- look intensely at the person, then look away. Give theMona lisa smile; I know something sneaky you don't. Nyeeehehehe..
Tony Leung: Stare, stare and continue to stare some more, and look so intense that his eyeballs will fall out anytime. Hahaha.

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But I digress. A lot. =P

How did watching a movie freak me out so much that I'm sitting here at 2.33am typing this instead of working on my English to BM translation of a newspaper article or doing what my body is telling me to- sleep.

Yeah, I never realised blogging was so therapeutic. I've totally got over my fear.

Well you see, I'm a goody-two-shoes kind of girl. The boring type you're saying? Hey, I heard that! It's not that I haven't been out late before, I used to come back from my friend's unit alone at 12 something or 1 without any qualms at all during the first half of my first semester. But Mum was worried. And kept telling me not to go out so late. Which is perfectly logical and sound advice. But somehow her fear seemed to seep a little at a time into my system. And so Mum called when I came back. She couldn't sleep without the knowledge that I was safely back at home. And then she started telling me about the stories in the papers, how KL is not a safe place, how can you go out till so late? Have to come up to the lift at night. Only you and Cynthia only, so dangerous............etc etc etc.

And so I was freaked out. Even in the safety of my room. Scared. Kept looking over my shoulder. I had this feeling that something bad was going to happen. Looked underneath my bed. Locked the door. Closed the windows and turned on air-con to feel safer. Come to think of it only Superman could have flown in through my window on the 5th floor!

Oh and it didn't help matters that the guys started telling us about this scary movie they watched before on the way back. And also the horror movie trailer before my movie. I strongly feel that people who PAY to watch a movie should not be forced to watch clips of other genres they didn't sign up for. Same goes with horror movie trailers on TV. I feel it's terribly unfair that we're being forced to watch clips which may be emotionally disturbing.



Now that I'm not scared anymore, I shall sleep. =)
Blogging is therapy indeed!!!!